…. with the teenage mind.
a fourteen year old.
what a tricky age. so complex and beautiful…complicated and ‘gray’.
You’re able to have conversations with them as a young adult. Yes, they challenge you and put down your opinions, but at the end of the day, you (the parent) know that they don’t disagree with you completely. they just don’t want to agree with you. it’s their own way of separating (slowly) from you. I don’t think their pulling away. (Ok, I do.) But… they’re becoming independent and confident people. Which is what you want them to be.
They use logic and they reason and they know right from wrong. That’s not to say that they follow rules, though.
They try to get away with as much as possible. they can’t use that logic all the time.
I love to hear them talk about the future. And i “WOW!” them because, for better or for worse, their mind is thinking of the future, now.
I love how the baby in her comes out, “mommy, hug me”. But her social life and interaction with her friends and other adults, impresses me. not just her abilities, but also her friends’ abilities. I love to talk to them about small things like Green Day or Buffy, but also about the larger things, like integrity and smoking and peer pressure and their beliefs and morals and drugs and drinking…and yes, the S word. gah!!! so cool, their minds.
not every day is conversation day.
there is some silent treatment , but for the most part, there is this curious person who will test limits and wants to try things and wants to test limits and go places (but not where you are).
they concern themselves with trivial (to us) problems. if the biggest issues were fads and fashion and a lot of pop culture… then, we’d be ok. this freedom they have… a carefree and, at times, a careless, attitude.
we spy, err, I mean we monitor their activities and means of communication. they get defensive and annoyed with us , but in the future, i believe it will make a difference (even if they won’t notice). a seamless difference.
and we worry and we frown. but most of all we love and trust that they will maneuver their way through bad situations. we hope.
and we want to encourage them to dream and pursue the things that are important and meaningful and fulfilling.
purpose. we want them to have a purpose. :)