the convenience of insanity and loneliness



The moment you hear their laughter and see their smiles
love passes by at full speed.
And, when they’re gone,
loneliness weigh you down.
Heavy and in slow motion.

And with love’s circumstances,
you feel numb.
You hear a clock ticking.
You’ll hold on to forgotten breaths.
And, then
melancholia intrudes. It harbors doubts.

Yet, you’ll find your way through a muted, stagnant gloom.
And with all your knowledge you’ll make your light.
But you’ll sense slow movements as you teeter
and, sometimes
you hear a comforting ring.

And you stare at the telephone.
You sit still and observe its sound.
And each ring is louder than the last.
And, then
you feel your lunacy deep inside.

Your thoughts are all of momentous choices.
You’re quiet, and you hum and you close your eyes.
And your madness is tamed, hopefully.
And, then
you bury it with your doubts and all your knowledge.

And you hear their laughter and their voices, and it makes you smile.
A smile so big, it opens up your eyes.
An immense, vacant space crowds you
and, that’s when
you count the raindrops on the window instead.

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